My Fallback Career in Porn Film

I really love MySpace. It is a wonderful way to re-connect with classmates and friends. However, sometimes you can get some really weird or annoying people contacting you. Some examples of annoying messages I've received:

Work at Home Scam
I'm rich and I want to be your sugar daddy
Check out my new album
Let's be friends with benefits

But the one I received yesterday TAKES THE CAKE!

My name is Randy and I am associated with (name omitted)Entertainment. We are currently looking for beautiful women who would like to make some very good money modeling and acting through our agency.If you are interested in making lots of money this may be the opportunity for you! All participants must be over 18 years old (with proper ID), and should be very comfortable with their body, as well as have a very adventurous and fun-loving spirit.We are currently looking for beautiful young white ladies to feature with a few of our very well-endowed black actors. One-on-one, as well as threesomes are offered. If you have ever fantasized about this kind of sexual experience, then here is a chance for you to get paid as you realize your fantasy!We are very discreet and respect the privacy of all who are involved. This opportunity is not for everyone, but if you are interested, email me back and we will begin to explore the options . . . .Looking forward to your reply,"

You know, in today's economy, few people's jobs are safe. It is comforting to know that if this whole public/chartered accounting thing doesn't work out, I have a career in porn film to fall back on (gag!).

My Cat Fight With Paris Hilton

Could there be a more hated "celebrity" than Paris Hilton? She is everywhere...you practically can't use the restroom without her being in your face. Well, as if that weren't enough, that little tart has started invading my dreams...

My Dreams (Nightmares) of Paris

I usually don't remember my dreams, probably because I don't get enough sleep. Lately, though I have been sleeping enough and have been remembering lots of dreams. I have had about 5 dreams with Paris. They all involve her being my friend and betraying me. Last night was wonderful though! When she betrayed me, I flew into a rage, called her some choice names and proceeded to kick her ass, cat-fight style. I'm pretty sure she will need some new hair extensions. When I woke up, I was absolutely energized and thrilled the whole day.

Why Dreams Fascinate Me

I don't believe in dreams being prophetic, but I do think they reveal a lot about what's going on in your subconscious. I think my Paris dreams reveal that I'm still struggling to get past the betrayal of my husband, whom I separated from last year.

Dreams can even be useful. I've had a couple of dreams in the past that helped me find objects I had lost. Just last week, I had been searching everywhere for my favorite t-shirt. I turned the house upside-down looking for it. I think dreams help organize your thoughts and memories, because I dreamed about the t-shirt and the first thing I did when I awoke was say to myself, "I know where it is!" and I went right to it.

In closing

Hopefully, I have had my last Paris dream, but if she DOES decide to come back for more, bring it b****!